‘Capture Your Grief – Day 1. Sunrise Dedication’ 

‘Nobody can go back and start a new beginning….but anyone can start today and make a new ending…’oh how wonderful it would be to rewrite history to never having to lose him, to go back and start a new beginning. Since it’s not possible I will live the rest of my life living it in ways to make him proud, and what a beautiful way to start today ☀️ With Jacob’s love from afar he will help us to smile – see miracles in life everyday. I’m glad I set my alarm to greet this new day on the 1st Oct 2016 a crisp Saturday morning to take that one photo among thousands that speak to you and reveal a hidden butterfly in the tree as the sun peeps through. The sun came up at 5.35am at my neck of the woods at Mount Warrigal NSW Australia. 
I have so many happy memories of family get-together’s in the surrounding areas of the photo. Many barbecues and picnics we’ve had on the shores of the lake and by the ocean and trekked around Windang Island at low tide like castaways on a deserted Island looking for treasure. My parents still live in the house where I grew up just a few streets below this photo. I made cubby houses in these bushes as a child with neighbourhood friends and slid down the long grass on broken up bits of cardboard. My husband and I moved back to this neighbourhood just before Jacob was born. So this place has been his childhood memories too. We share that connection of beauty. I have Jacob’s past locked deep within my heart as I travel the future with his older siblings. I will search for pieces of him in everything that life will bring – future weddings, births of new generations, rainbows after a storm, songs that come on the radio, the stars in the night sky, and all the new colours I see because he was mine. Fly high forever 20 like the butterfly I captured in this photo. 
(A message to Jacob – On top of this mountain I’m a little bit closer to you and I’ll be using your camera everyday over the month of October to ‘capture my grief’ I will continue to see the world through your eyes through the lens of your camera. I’m sure I heard the birds call out your name through the trees – ‘Jacob’) 
Morning Son, rise x 

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