Since the loss of our beautiful brown eyed boy, I have made a promise to myself that I live out the rest of my life in ways that would make him proud. I talk about him often and own the bad days and the tears. I am proud of the tears because it means I have loved and lost. I am capturing our lives through the lens of Jacob’s camera…so we are seeing the world through the eyes of my child. I hope he will see all that I capture. It is my dad’s 80th birthday today and we had a beautiful family gathering, showering those we love with love. My nephew James wasn’t present as he’s still holidaying overseas so we felt his absence just like Jacob. We took family photos with Jacob’s stand out cut out again today so he’s forever present in all we do. My mum even wiped his mouth with a serviette as something had stuck on it from last time we got him out of the box. We explored the creek behind my sister Trisha’s house and saw an eel and lizards and sailed floating leaves along the current with my girls and nieces. Jacob was mentioned in my dad’s poem that I wrote for him to commemorate his special birthday day. I mentioned how Jacob would want us to live out the rest of our lives.
Happy 80th birthday dad x
Today you celebrate your 80th year
30th October a warm sunny day.
A time to spend with family and friends
A perfect chance for us to say
Glad to see you here today
As you puzzle in the sun
Doing crosswords and soduku
Checking over twice – you won
Sharkies won for us this year
Go the black white and blue
Glad we saw them win the final
Followers through and through
You scared us all a few months ago
When you became unwell
A hospital trip was needed
All good now’s a better story to tell
But life has given us lemons
And to taste a bitter pill
But we can make us some lemonade
To drink and take our fill
We are strong together
In everything we do
Despite what life’s thrown at us
We see another view
Jacob would want us all to be strong
In the ways we live our life
Honouring him in the ways we live it
Through triumphs and strife
Nobody saw that was coming
Stephen’s heart was nearly shattered
We need to keep our circle of life
As family that’s always mattered
Keeping loved ones together
As the leader of the pack
What a big role to fill
Trying to keep things on track
So as you celebrate one more year
A gift denied to some
We all should be thankful
And be blessed with many more to come.
So as we enjoy another day together
We won’t forget to smile
See miracles in life everyday
As we walk our own life’s mile
Our family is like music
With notes low and high
It’s always a beautiful song
To sing and get you by.
But the song for today
Is happy birthday your day is here
Time to spend it with those you love
Hip hip hooray we’ll cheer.
While you sit outside in the garden
And look around the view
As you spy a little butterfly
It’s Jacob wishing you happy birthday too.
We saw a black and white butterfly in amongst the trees and flowers.